Katherine Heigl: “I Was Failing Naleigh”

Grey’s Anatomy alum Katherine Heigl is the latest celebrity mom to blog about the joys of motherhood. The actress – who stars in the upcoming action comedy One for the Money, in theaters January 27 – writes in her first blog for iVillage and opens up about 3-year-old daughter Naleigh and the challenges of balancing career and motherhood.

I have always known I wanted to be a mother,” Katherine wrote. “When I was maybe 10 years old, I would ask the mothers at church if I could hold their babies during the service: Since so many of them had several children, they were happy to oblige me. I would skip Sunday school to go play with the kids in the nursery.”

She continued: “I have also always known I wanted to be an actress. From the moment I walked onto my first set when I was 11 years old, I knew I had found my passion. I loved everything about making movies: the wardrobe that made the character come alive in me; the hair and makeup that could transform me; the cast and crew that became like a family for those few short months; and the craft service where there was never a shortage of sodas and Slim Jims.”

The 33-year-old Emmy-winner said that acting and motherhood are her “two great loves.”

“I could not have known when I was 10 years old holding other women’s children and playing the greatest game of make-believe on earth that I would one day have to reconcile my two great loves,” Katherine wrote. “I didn’t realize that having it all would not look and feel as I imagined. I knew, of course, as I prepared to welcome my daughter into my life that it would be a bit of a juggling act but I had no doubt that I could do it. After all, it’s 2012 and women have been told that we can have it all if we want it. I went into it full throttle, ready to buckle down and make it all work seamlessly as I always imagined I could. The thing is I couldn’t.”

But as it turns out, balancing motherhood and her career is not an easy juggling act.

No matter how great my intentions, how lofty my goals, how passionate my commitment, I was failing,” Katherine wrote. “I was failing my work, I was failing my daughter, I was failing my husband. I was stressed out and exhausted. I was worried and afraid it was all slipping through my fingers no matter how tight my grip. I couldn’t appreciate or enjoy the moments with Naleigh because I feared they weren’t enough for her and knew they weren’t enough for me. I couldn’t enjoy the work because I was so distracted by the little being in my trailer waiting for me. I couldn’t help but wonder what I had gotten myself into and if the choice I made to be a working mother was the most selfish decision of my life.”

Continue reading Katherine’s blog at iVillage

Filed under: Katherine Heigl

Photo credit: Flynet

  • Janna

    Being a more well-rounded woman is a good thing, it probably even makes you a better mother. Why do we women guilt ourselves about everything? I’d like to hear ONE man reveal how guilty he feels about leaving his children to work!

  • Anonymous9

    Why does everything have to be such a drama with her? So boring.

    Maybe she ought to give a call to Julie Bowen to find out how to have kids and work without making it seem like you’re the first person to ever do it. Julie manages to do it without being the least bit insufferable.

    • Anonymous

      What she’s saying is what so many women everywhere feel. It’s really not unusual at all. The only reason it looks like “drama” to you is that she is a public figure, while the rest of us are not, so nobody wants to interview us. I really don’t like her for other reasons, but I think you’re being pretty unfair here.

      • Anonymous9

        Really? I don’t hear a lot of my friends discussing their lofty goals, and their passion for what they’re doing, or how they are failing. They just talk about juggling stuff and how they wish their husbands would help a little more. Every word she picks is so over-the-top dramatic and needlessly so. We are all trying to make this all work, but she has that “mine is the first child ever born” attitude that grates.

        • Anonymous

          Look, I mean, you don’t like her, we get it. But now you’re knocking her for having “lofty goals”, “passion for what she’s doing” and the facts that she can’t juggle it all so she feels like she’s failing?

          I just simply could not disagree more. I don’t get the “mine is the first child ever born” attitude at all. I just don’t see/hear it.

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